Why I Put My Son on ADHD Meds

Sometimes I get judgment from other people about putting my son on ADHD medications, but I don’t regret it. Before he was on medication, he was constantly distracting other children in his class and not doing his work. There is a stigma associated with ADHD medications, but judgment is not helpful.

Ever since John started taking his medication, it has been night and day. He is now able to do his homework and pay attention in class. His grades have improved tremendously. It has been such a positive medication for him. His entire life has gotten better.

ADHD is a real condition. My child needs his medication to be able to pay attention in school and do his work. Something is out of whack in his brain, and it needs to be balanced. He has seen several physicians who have all said the same thing: John has ADHD and he needs to be treated for it.

So putting my son on ADHD medication turned out to be the right move for me. It may not be for you. That is the thing about parenting. Everyone has to do it differently based on what their children need.

To read more of this mother’s story, look for our e-book, Mother in the Mirror, coming soon in fall 2017.

My Son is a Drug Addict

The moment you realize your son is a drug addict is a moment you will never forget. You start to feel guilty. You ask yourself what you did wrong as a mother. This happened to me five years ago when I first started noticing my son, Mark, acting apathetic and withdrawn. And when he went off to college, it got so much worse. He started abusing hydrocodone, and then it lead to oxycodone. He even used heroin a few times. I didn’t know what to do.

I gave him an ultimatum. I told him he had to go to rehab or my father and I would no longer pay for him to go to college. So he did go to rehab, but his heart wasn’t in it. Luckily, they got him off of the drugs, and they put him on Suboxone. I knew that he wasn’t in danger of overdosing after that. But once he left the rehab, months later, he had just transferred his addiction to Suboxone.

It wasn’t until he came to me of his own volition and said “I want to get help” that he was able to affect any real change. He went back to rehab for his Suboxone addiction. They helped him to get completely clean, and then he joined Narcotics Anonymous. This seemed to really help him, and for that, I am forever grateful to the NA program. He got a sponsor, and he started working the steps.

Over time in the program, I noticed he was not acting as selfishly. He was doing kind things for others, he was treating me better, he was even doing volunteer work once a month. If you are mother to an alcoholic or drug addict, it is imperative that you find somewhere where your son or daughter can get treatment. Unfortunately, if your son or daughter wants to get off Suboxone, there aren’t many options.

My journey as a mother has been a difficult one. Luckily, NA saved my son’s life. And for that, I am eternally grateful.

To read more of this mother’s story, look for our e-book, Mother in the Mirror, coming soon in fall 2017.

Having a Non-Verbal Child

I hate it when I tell people my daughter is six years old and they look at me stunned. I hate that I have to just speak for her whenever strangers ask her what her name is. I hate that she can’t tell me what she wants verbally.

When I first realized my daughter was non-verbal, I have to admit that I was upset. I’m a public speaker. How could I have given birth to a child who cannot speak? Sometimes I actually have dreams where she comes to me and tells me something. It’s wonderful. I don’t know what I would do if she actually said to me, “Mom, I love you.” I think my heart might explode.

It’s important to remember when you have a child with special needs that it’s going to feel bad sometimes. It’s going to be frustrating. It’s going to be sad. You’re going to get angry with yourself and feel like a failure. But are you a failure? No, you’re not.

Sheila and I have a system now. She has learned how to sign, and she is able to communicate just as effectively as any other six year old. We enrolled her in a special school. Sure, we have our problems, but overall, she is doing well.

But last night, I realized something important. Having a non-verbal child has taught me how to communicate more effectively. I have to be very conscious of what I am saying. Now that I have learned sign language, I am a lot more aware of the words that I am choosing. Could I have foreseen that I would learn so much from my daughter? No, definitely not. But that is one of the best things about being a mother. There are a ton of surprises.

So if I could go back and have a verbal child, I wouldn’t. I love my daughter just the way she is.

To read more of this mother’s story, look for our e-book, Mother in the Mirror, coming soon in fall 2017.